The training year is underway, and students are beginning to work directly with families, developing skills and encountering the challenges inherent in systemic practice with more than one person in the room. Ged Smith—British consultant family therapist, author, and former Editor of Context, the UK magazine for family therapy and systemic practice—has trained family therapists for many years, including at the Tavistock Clinic. In a recent paper, he identified 16 practitioner pointers for those learning to work with families. Given the strong emphasis on theory in professional journals, this paper offers a valuable practice‑focused perspective.
What Does he Suggest?
While it is impossible to detail all Smith’s suggestions some can be grouped under general headings.
Let’s Start with Questions
The first four recommendations address the skill of questioning beginning with enquiry about the referring person to identify their place in the family system and value of inviting them to join a session. He then notes that we must persist with questioning about each person’s ideas and hopes for therapy and not be distracted. In bower(note), the protocols for practice at Bower Place, this is request, the first item on the agenda which establishes the contractual basis for therapy. It is easy to ask the first question but important to follow up with additional enquiry to fully understand a response. Finally, he recommends that questions be brief and focussed and not offer multiple choices.
How You are in the Session
A hallmark of systemic therapy is attention paid to the therapeutic system and the practitioner as an integral part of the process. Recognising that therapy is an exchange that allows difficult questions to be asked requires the practitioner to own their authority and not minimise it with apology or diffidence. Being ‘too nice’ and avoiding challenge is also a risk for trainee practitioners. Having the confidence to take risks and comment on processes in the session and embracing playfulness and humour will further support the work. Additionally, it is always better to own a mistake rather than attempt to cover it up’. It is also worth remembering that your client is probably more nervous than you!
Think About Your Client
A key to practice of bower(note) is recognition that inequality lies at the heart of all human difficulties and must be managed both between people and between the client and practitioner. Smith reminds us that many of our clients will have experienced discrimination throughout their lives and we should not expect they will be ‘fully present and trusting in the therapeutic process, especially if you belong to many visibly privileged groups’. It is our responsibility to manage the inequality.
One group who are unequal to adults and easy to overlook are children who ‘usually know more than we think they know and notice everything, which can surprise their parents.’ Engaging with them can introduce playfulness and levity and allows for an understanding that every person’s behaviour is a communication which needs to be understood and accommodated.
Take Advantage of Recursion
No matter how well or poorly one believes a session has been it is always useful to seek the clients’ feedback. This feeds information back to both the client and practitioner system and when coupled with discussion of the next session agenda as practiced by bower(note) enriches the process.
In Conclusion
While Smith’s paper is written for students of family therapy his wisdom is a timely reminder for all practitioners.
Smith, G. (2025) So, You’re Doing a Family Therapy Course…… Journal of Family Therapy, 2025; 47:e12495 https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-6427.12495
©Copyright Bower Place™ Pty. Ltd. 2026
